CHAPTER THIRTY

It felt strange wearing new clothing. I was still used to the stiffness of military cloth. After I left Simmons' home, I went and bought a hat and then headed to the train station. On the train, a couple of pilots were in the same room with me. They looked at my clothing and I could tell that they did not like me.

When I arrived in Stresa, I found it was almost empty. Only a few of the hotels were still open. I went to the nicest one and got a room for two people, with a nice, big bed. Then I went to the bar downstairs and had a drink. The barman was pretty friendly. We talked for a bit. I told him I was on leave. Then I asked if he had seen any foreign nurses in town. He told me he had and that they were staying in another hotel across the street. I thanked him, paid the bill, and left.

While I walked over to where Catherine was staying, I thought about my situation. It did not seem to me that the war was truly finished. I felt like a young boy who had not gone to class and was now trying to imagine what the class was doing that day.

When I got to the hotel, I found Catherine and Miss Ferguson having dinner there. Miss Ferguson was the first to see me.

"I don't believe it," she said.

Catherine then turned around and, seeing me, smiled and cried at the same time. I sat down with them and asked the waitress to bring me some food. Miss Ferguson looked at me with unfriendly eyes.

"She may be happy to see you, but I'm not. She is going to have her baby and you are probably going to run back to your America. You are terrible."

Catherine and I smiled at each other.

"Don't you smile like that, Catherine," said Ferguson, "You are no better than him. You are just as bad. You should be ashamed of yourself to be with a man like him."

Catherine then got up from her chair, walked over to Ferguson, and put her arms around her. Ferguson began to cry.

"He's probably got a wife in America. If he didn't, you would have married by now."

Catherine and I laughed again.

"Stop that laughing! I'm very serious!" Ferguson shouted through her tears. "Just leave now! Go away! I don't want to see any of you anymore!"

"We won't leave you. Let's finish our meal," Catherine said trying to calm her down.

"Well ... I'm sorry. I'm being so stupid now. I can't help it."

Later on, in our hotel room, Catherine and I were able to be together again. She was different from other women. With the others, I always felt empty and alone. With Catherine it always felt like it was the two of us against the rest of the world. I felt strong and brave with her.

In the morning, we had breakfast in bed.

"Do you want a newspaper to read? We could call downstairs and have them bring one up," Catherine said.

"I'd rather not. I don't want to know anything about the war."

"Are you in danger? Do the police want to arrest you?"

"They want to kill me."

"Then we must leave the country as soon as possible. You see that lake outside of our window? Switzerland is just on the other side."

I suddenly began to have doubts about myself. "Am I a weak person for leaving the Army? Do I deserve to be killed?"

"Of course not. Don't talk like that."

"I certainly feel better about it when we're together. Let's get out of here. Let's go where we don't have to worry anymore."

(end of section)